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Saturday, September 17, 2016

Amazon reviewers trash Hillary's new book



Oh my gosh are the reviews brutal.

And hilarious.

From chjhorses:
Pre-ordered an autographed copy but had to return it after this week's announcement as I was worried it was contaminated with pneumonia bacteria. I didn't want to end up exposed to the illness like her grandkids in Chelsea's apartment she was playing with on 9/11 after she collapsed, or the little girl she was hugging in the street afterwards. Thought about ordering the Kindle version but I thought it might open my device up to being hacked by communist countries. I wasn't too surprised to see Tim Kaine on the front cover giving the traditional National Socialist salute, I felt it fitting. Strongly recommended for those who believe the USA isn't anything special and should be more like the peaceful utopias of North Korea, Iran, or Cuba.
From Elaine:
I bought this thinking it would be a how-to book. I wanted "How to set up your own Foundation for fun and profit." Also, would like to have seen a chapter on "Ten easy steps to setting up your own secure server in a bathroom."
From Daniel B.:
I was going to read this book.....I really was. But just as I got started, I found myself under sniper fire, passed out, and fell and hit my head. After that I got double vision and had to wear glasses that were so damn thick I couldn't even see to read. Then I had an allergic reaction to something and started coughing so hard I spit out what looked like a couple of lizard's eyeballs, my limbs locked up, and I passed out and fell down again, waking up only to find out I had been diagnosed with pneumonia 2 days earlier. Somehow I managed to power through it all, but it's a good thing I was able to make a small fortune on this random small trade in the commodities market (cattle futures or some such thing) and then, miracle of all miracles, a few banks offered me a few million to just talk to their employees for a few minutes - and all that really helped out because I swear I was dead broke and couldn't figure out how I was gonna come up with the 6 bucks to pay for this book, let alone pay the $1,500 for my health insurance this month. I still want to read it, but, honestly, what difference at this point does it make? I hear it sucks anyway.
From Urban Legend:
I have to start by saying I am a registered independent voter, and more importantly, a life-long independent thinker. I have voted for more D's than R's in my life, as well as several third-party candidates. This is the lamest, weakest, most politically-absurd book ever written, as far as I know. Save your money for food for your family just in case she is elected.
From Amy Sterling Casil:
This book begins well. The first sentence says, "America is great because America is good." It goes downhill from there. My experience has been that people want to know the inside truth about their role models. I read page after page looking for tips on how to ask for big payments from rich foreign money launderers, military dictators or junk food manufacturers. It was just a bunch of malarkey even more boring than a 6th grade Common Core history book. I wanted to find out how to delete hundreds of thousands of voter registrations and emails, but no such luck. This book talks about hoe every vote counts. As long as it's for Hillary Clinton.
From Ron NYC:
I got a copy of this book from someone in my office. First, I don't know why Kaine is giving the Nazi salute on the cover. I couldn't get past the first third off the book before realizing that she is actually charging people to read her ideas and Trump gives specific policy information on his website for free. Even though I didn't pay for the book, I want my money back.
From USC90:
The chapter where Hillbilly talks about her battle with Parkinson's Disease was difficult to read. Difficult because it was missing from the book.
From the Ghost:
If three words could sum up this work of unbridled fiction it would be "Basket of Deplorable."
Quite frankly, I have never read more self-entitled dribble. I ended up passing out and had to be dragged into my bed, ended up losing a shoe.
Do not recommend.
From Julianne L. Wiley:
There was more backbone in my order of fish oil softgels.
I see the price is now $0.01 plus postage, new, from some of Amazon's sellers. Postage is still steep, though, when you consider I'd be using the book for mulch between my Fall fava bean rows.
When Hillary and Whatsizname are ready to pay me to take the rest of the press run off their hands, I'll order 30 cubic meters.
Back the dump trucks right up to my back fence. Thank you very mulch.
From seaoh:
This could be the first "book" in history to have more reviews on amazon the actual sales bwwwwaaaahAAHA lol
The reviews went downhill from there.

I feel sorry for her readers.

There is an antidote for "Stronger Together."

My new book, "Trump the Press," is a fun read that details how the experts missed the rise of Trump.

Please purchase "Trump the Press" through Create Space.

The book also available in Kindle and as a paperback on Amazon.

Autographed copies area available. Email me at DonSurber@GMail.com for details.

21 comments:

  1. I liked the "more reviews on Amazon than actual sales". BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    On Fausta's blog she actually identifies the shoe left behind and the price. Fausta is the place to go for shoe info.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did Manolo the Shoe Blogger muff this one?

      Delete
    2. Any time. You know I love you. Now if you would just leave New Jersey.

      Delete
  2. Hubbo and the Second Charkra started this book thing.

    Nice to see an end put to it.

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  3. It has a ways to go before it breaks the record for Amazon reviews of Tuscan Dairy Whole Vitamin D Milk, but give it time, just give it time.

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  4. You mean to say that this is Typhoid Mary's bio and not her "My Name is Earl" style karmic repair list?

    Perhaps karma is trying to make some sort of point to Patient Zero.

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  5. These are great reviews! Great to read, great for laughs! Great for deciding to stay faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar away from this book.

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  6. I do have to ask why the first four commenters didn't check the funny and cool blocks, though.

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  7. You'd have to think that, once the chance of future rewards are removed, quite a few of Hillary Clinton's "friends" are going to feel hard done by for all their years of support.

    2017 is going to have more leaks than the Welsh Nationalist Party.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it is going to be ugly. They did not pay her because of her ideology. They paid her to get results and if she fails there will be hell to pay for her and billy. She is not running to be president now, she is running for her life.

      Delete
    2. Yes, it is going to be ugly. They did not pay her because of her ideology. They paid her to get results and if she fails there will be hell to pay for her and billy. She is not running to be president now, she is running for her life.

      Delete
  8. Big D, those of us in the know, know that you have already written the definitive book on this election. While reading it, it was like the coolest kid in my class had decided to befriend me. Boy did I put up with a lotta shit at CPAC 2016. The "pundits" are now saying this could happen...Trump could be the next POTUS. I'm LOLing and yelling, not could, you fools, WILL.

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  9. I might buy a few copies if the prices is right. I'm thinking about putting in a worm bed and cardboard is so hard to find without the pizza smell gagging me. Janet Reno has Parkinson and so does Hillary. I wonder if it can be sexually transmitted.

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  10. Having books to sell is a great way to get contributions that aren't contributions. I remember Jim Wright, at the time Speaker of the House, got caught up in an ethics investigation and had to resign because he was using book sales as a way to avoid contribution limits or some such.
    I'm always suspicious of ego books like this one that come out right before a political campaign or election.

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  11. The choice of the book title, "Stronger Together," is an unfortunate one after her 9/11 medical emergency. It serves as a reminder that without Kaine physically holding her up in that cover photo she'd collapse to the floor. Ditto for her campaign. The slogan says Hillary isn't strong enough to pull her own weight. What were they thinking when they created this slogan for the campaign? I'll bet they thought they were oh so clever.

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    Replies
    1. Well, based on yesterday's events, we don't look so strong in New Jersey. Not strong in NYC. Definitely not strong at the Mall of America, or in St. Cloud either. The Muzzies don't want to be "together" with us, Hillary. Can you get that through your addled head?

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  12. The best one is the guy who gave her a 5 star review. It was funny and witty.

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