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Monday, August 22, 2016

With help like this, who needs Republicans?

Billionaire Democrat Jim Justice seeks to become another rich Democratic governor of West Virginia. Tiger Woods and John Daly just knee-capped Justice.

From the Golf Channel:
WHITE SULPHUR SPRINGS, W. Va. – Tiger Woods and John Daly have decided to team up and raise money for a cause: The health of Greenbrier owner Jim Justice.
At 6-foot-7, Justice cuts an imposing figure, but the golfers are worried about his weight and have come up with a plan to help.
“I told him I’d give him $100 for every pound he loses, to any charity he wants,” Daly said after posting a final-round 65 at Justice’s own Greenbrier Classic. “Tiger said he’d do it, too. Because we care about him. He’s a big guy. If we could get him to lose some weight and add about 30-40 years to his life, he’ll be happy. It’s time somebody did something for him after him always doing something for everybody else.”
Emphasizing Justice's health problems (and he does show signs of problems) is good news for Republican gubernatorial candidate.

By the way, adding 30 to 40 years to the life of a 65-year-old man would put him in the 95 to 105 age range. That may not be as nice as Daly thinks. But the life expectancy for a healthy 65-year-old white man in America is 17.8 years. Justice's abnormal height shortens his life expectancy. Maybe they can give him $100 for every inch he shrinks.


  1. It's called the Rockefeller Gambit. - Elric

  2. Replies
    1. Dip the guy in cold water. That might do the trick.

  3. What if his favorite charity is the DNC?

  4. Jim Justice? Wouldn't happen to be the son of Buford T., would he?

    "For some reason, you sounded a little taller on radio."